I didn't even smell the smoke billowing from the toaster oven and filling up my entire kitchen yesterday. When the toaster oven dinged, I walked into the kitchen and couldn't even see the toaster oven from across the room. There was so much smoke! It filled my entire house and now, even after a full day of opening the windows and doors, running the air conditioner on high, wiping down surfaces, burning candles, my house still smells like burned popcorn 24 hours later. Aye, yi, yi.
Anyway, to get back to the subject from yesterday: the book, Money and The Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Wealth, Health, and Happiness. Yesterday I mentioned one thing about myself that has kept me from attaining the financial freedom I desire:
I saw being wealthy as a negative situation (again, gasp!) and often said outloud: "I never want to be rich." Something I didn't mention in yesterday's post, you know, before Charro Tortilla dropped by, was that I often blamed other forces for our financial situation - not living human beings, but God, or the Universe, or Source Energy, or this-life karma, or past-life karma, or life lessons I needed to learn. Anything but myself or my husband.
Here are a couple of lines from the book:
Page 5: When you come to the place of openly condemning the financial success that you crave, not only can that financial success never come to you, but you are also forfeiting your God-given rights to your health and happiness as well.
Ouch. REALLY? All those times I said I thought wealth was an unnecesary burden, I was sabotaging my financial future. Great. However, now I can move forward, knowing our success is all up to us as individuals and how we choose to perceive money. It is a matter of clicking off my negative image of wealth. It will be tough, but I'm going to do everything I can to change it. In order to do it, I will have to come up with something I see as worthy that I can do with the money. Then, I won't see it as such a negative thing. Because realistically, I know we can live with very little possessions and enjoy a simplified life. My husband and I have been doing it for a long time. But, if I can find something that excites me that we can do with the money, I can change my attitude in time. I know it.
Page 6: When you give the credit or blame to another for your success or lack of it - you are powerless to make any change.
Now, this is an interesting statement. As a child, I was raised in the Christian church where everything good came from God and everything bad was a lesson meant to make you stronger and by no means was God's fault. God gave you good things and stood by you during the bad. God was in control at all times.
As an adult, while I still believe in God, I don't necessarily believe that everything good is a direct gift to me from God because I am special. I don't believe God gave me that good parking place yesterday at Hobby Lobby. Or caused me to stumble upon the orange juice that was on sale at the grocery store. I am grateful for those things, but I'm not convinced that any heavenly being caused them to happen to me. I would never say for sure one way or the other because I will never claim to know anything for sure about religion or spirituality. Religion is man-made and spirituality is still far beyond my egoistic brain's grasp and understanding. Anyway, my spiritual crisis will have to be reserved for another time.
Moving on, while I am not sure who to give credit for the good things in my life, or if no one but me and some good fortune deserve the credit, I have no problem blaming those same Beings for causing my grief. And that is a fault of my own. Sometimes...and I'm only going to say sometimes because my Leo pride will not allow me to say any more... but sometimes, I have trouble saying that I am at fault. Ouch! There. I said it. And if any of you tell my husband I said it, I will delete this post and deny it!!
So, after six pages of this book, I learned I need to work on my perception of wealth's worth and my acceptance of responsibility for my current situation. It will be a journey, but a worthwhile one. Anyone care to join me?