Friday, October 9, 2009

All The Single Mommies! Oh oh oh oh oh oh!

I know I said my next blog would be an awards ceremony, but I've got to give props to all the single mothers out there first. I've had a small, small taste of your world this week and to be perfectly frank, I don't know HOW YOU DO IT!!

My husband was out of town this entire week. He left Sunday and comes back tonight (finally!). He has left town before...just not for a whole week. It is usually three days at the most.

And I have to tell you...I was looking forward to this week alone. I actually enjoy alone time - even before I became a mother, I was fine being alone. I was looking forward to watching Project Runway in my jammies with no interruptions, eating soup for dinner (my husband thinks soup is pointless as a meal and I love it - it's coziness in a bowl!), reading blogs, writing blogs, keeping the house calm and collected (my husband is the fun one who gets my son and dogs riled up), keeping order and chaos to a minimum. And for the most part, I did okay. I did get to watch Project Runway, I did have soup for dinner twice, and I kept everyone and every dog pretty even tempered.

However, I thought I would have more alone time in the evenings and during Max's naps to blog and read and catch up on chores. I'm not sure where I got that deranged idea. I had no time. I haven't checked my blogs all week. I haven't written since Monday. I'm behind in laundry, dishes, I have clothes to hang and put away, I've only showered once all week, my face has broken out in zits (which hasn't happened in years), and I'm starving by 4 0'clock because I forget to eat after breakfast.

By the third evening, I started going to bed feeling a little bit defeated. And I had this unending sense of impending doom lurking around inside my head and chest. My shoulders and back have been aching from stress (well, and from carrying our 50 pound, all-muscle, bull terrier from the back door to the bathtub twice a day. It has been raining here all week and that barking battle axe gets MUUUUUDDY!), and I had nightmares again.

What I want to know from all you rock star single moms out there is how do you not just let your kids watch tv all day? On Tuesday, I let Max watch Sprout and Noggin most of the day so I could try to gain some chore momentum. And I felt guilty about it ALL DAY, too. I know I'm not supposed to let a one year old stare into the boob tube for an entire afternoon of Sesame Street, Blue's Clues, and Yo Gabba Gabba, but what other choice did I have? My house was starting to smell like wet dog and old cheese.

And what about those single moms (or dads!) who work outside of the home all day and then have to come home to clean and cook and give baths and do bedtime routines and all that jazz ALL BY THEMSELVES? I'm surprised you have showers at all. Someone should give you a million dollars. Or at least write you a song. "All the Single Mommies" should be Beyonce's next big hit.

So, to All the Single Mommies, All the Single Mommies, cheers to you. I have great respect and adoration for you. I am sincerely in awe of you. I even tear up a bit thinking about the same way I tear up when contestants lose a lot of weight on The Biggest Loser (that show reduces me to a blubbering mess every time). It is because I am very proud of you...your courage, your stamina, your discipline, your selflessness. I should never complain about my husband again (but you know I will) because at least I have someone else to take out the recycling (another thing I never did this week. Wait...maybe that is why my house smells like old cheese?).


  1. I am so glad you wrote this! I agree with you 100%. I give much respect to single moms and dads. My hubby's been gone a few weekends and I don't get a shower either. Then I'm just plain crabby when he gets home cuz I'm so tired and I feel like I didn't accomplish anything while he was gone.

    My mom was a single mom of 3. We were all born really close together, so my mom had at least 2 in diapers at once. I have no idea how she did it. Makes me respect her even more.

    To all the single moms and dads, BRAVO. You are beyond strong!

    Happy Friday to you!

  2. don't feel bad about an afternoon of Noggin, it's preschool on tv! : )

    My mom raised four kids while going to college at night, I try to think of how hard she had it when I get frazzled.

    Glad you enjoyed your soup! I graze all night when my husband is away, nachos and chocolate seem to come onto the menu a lot!

  3. My mom was a single mom and I don't know how she did it. I agree with you, single moms deserve a rousing cheer.

  4. I could not agree more - my husband travels often weeks at a time sometimes - it's tough and I have an appreciation of women who handle it was grace.. When one of daughters and I picked up my husband from the airport yesterday- she called him mom on accident - he said "I'm not, Mom" in a laughing voice... and innocently my daughter said "sorry, I'm just used to saying mom all the time because you are never here".. wow - I could see the sadness creep into my husband's face... All this time - I had thought he loved getting away from the daily chaos of raising kids and family life but in reality - I'm thinking he would like to change spots with me.. at least for a couple of hours..
    Love to you - and way to go Single moms - You have my vote of awe...

  5. I don't know how they do it either. Maybe it's a matter of some brilliant time management skills of which I seem to have none.

  6. You are a savvy little blogger! I'm so sorry I never visit blogs anymore! Damned FB! And also, for the comment, thank you, you are a doll. And dont forget we are making plans soon. Really.

  7. I am home all day every day monday through friday when my husband goes to work. i do pretty much all of the cleaning, laundry, bills, sweeping, etc AND take care of our son.
    my husband is really good at taking over when he gets home but we still end of doing most things together. when he is away or works late, i get REALLY pooped. i hear ya.
    for me, it's hard to find the energy to do anything when I get a moment of peace.

  8. i feel like a single mom a lot..

    my husband is working forever...sigh..

    even on weekends..he rounds very often(doctor)

    following you through under 100 followers club at MBC..i hope you do follow back

  9. So true! I don't know how they do it! I've been away with my daughter for only a few days and I feel like I'm going to need a vacation after this one!

    My husband is so helpful with her!

  10. i was a single mom for 2 1/2 years and it was no easy feat...but it was so worth it...and i supposed what the real priorities were. at the end of the day it didn't matter if i had folded all the laundry, as long as my little man was taken care of and loved...the chores could wait...

  11. Oh wow.. what an amazing post. Beautifully written. I had to laugh at the "shower" part, I think that is the thing I wish for the most. I posted about that very thing today on my blog. I have stuck Trinity in front of the TV many times (something I swore I would never do), just to get some housework done. LOL.
    Funny, I have always been a single mom, from the time I was pregnant, so I've never really known any other way.
    But it was very nice to hear the beautiful things you said. I think parenting is hard work no matter single or not.
    I love being a single mom, I really do, but something like this is nice to hear.
    You just made my day... and probably brought a smile to every single moms face.
    I "heart" you!!!

  12. so so true. i comment daily about being a single parent because my husband leaves before the sun is up and returns once it's down, but man, to really really be one my own - wow - like you said, kudos to those moms !!!
    and thanks for my lesson on the adding the link - i have no internet right now and am at a friends, in your boat, hu? - but will try it once i have service again!

  13. I completely agree, and I have no idea how they do it! I know several single moms who have it all together and I definitely have to give them props. Great post by the way! Hope the house is smelling better now that hubby is home :)


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