Friday, November 13, 2009

Bruised and janked.

find the humor...find the humor...find the humor...

Okay. I'm good. Had to remind myself to find the humor.

This week has been I-bruised-my-tailbone-and-found-out-I-wasn't-pregnant-again difficult. Because that is exactly what happened.

My husband was out of town for three days this week. A couple of hours after he left town on Monday, I went to look for those second-hand shoes I told you he wanted me to buy for our son. So, basically this is all his fault (I can always find a way....).

I was in the way-overcrowded and too-stuffed used clothing store for about two minutes before I bent down and accidentally rammed the corner of a hard plastic bin into my butt crack, brutally bruising my tailbone. Ouchie.

So, I've been an invalid most of the week, unable to sit down, lay down, bend down, pick up my son, or do anything but stand around and stare at people and things. My poor son wasn't able to understand why I couldn't pick him up or play with him and showed me his general unhappiness by throwing himself on the ground, usually hitting his head on the way down, and crying, to which I could only respond my patting him on the head...if I could reach that far down.

I was lucky to have my fabulous Aunt B and my mom come over to help in the late afternoons for bathtime and dinner time. And when I became brave enough to try to sit, I sat on one of my son's stuffed donut-shaped toys. He has several big, stuffed rings and they all have a different animal's head attached. So, whenever I was sitting on the couch or at the dinner table, I had a stuffed elephant head coming out from between my legs. Awkward.

By Thursday, I was feeling better, able to pick my son up again, although still not able to sit or lay on my back. And, it is about the same today. Yay! I'm improving!

However, last night I took a pregnancy test, hoping this would be the month! After three minutes, I went to the bathroom and looked at the test. It said, "YOU ARE NOT PREGNANT AGAIN, YOUR REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM IS JANKED AND WHY DO YOU KEEP TORTURING YOURSELF?!!!"

Okay, well, maybe it just said, "Not Pregnant", but I swear that is what I heard. And yes, it talked to me.

All I want for Christmas is to get pregnant without having to have endometriosis surgery again!! Is that too much to ask? It took us thirteen months of trying and a painful surgery before I was able to get pregnant with my first. What did I do in my former life to have such problems getting pregnant? Did I take Jonathan Swift's, A Modest Proposal, a little too literally and eat my kids for dinner? Was I the lying woman in the Bible who told King Solomon to cut her baby in half? What did I do, for Pete's sake (as my mother would say)?!

Anyway, on with the show. I really need to get going on shredding some rotisserie chicken for dinner and washing my mildewed shower curtain. But, who wants to do those things? Okay, okay, I'm going. Sheesh.

19 comments:

  1. Oh sweetie...sorry peeing on the stick didn't work out for you this month. It will!

    And the tailbone. Eek. Been there done that. I say my butt on a bean bag chair for three weeks. My girls thought it was hilarious. Not so much:)

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  2. Ugh, what a week you're having, although the part about the elephant toy sticking out of your legs cracked me up.

    I hope you get what you want for Christmas!

    And cleaning off your shower curtain sounds as much fun as me scrubbing the explosion inside the microwave.

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  3. Ouch, tailbones. I've had too many problems with mine. bleh!
    Glad you are doing a little better. Trying to get pregnant is also our next step. Sorry it didn't happen for you this time. :(

    Take care,
    Michelle

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  4. What a crappy week. But you did manage to find the humor. And that's what's important...using your misery to make other people laugh. It's like a public service...

    So sorry your test had to talk to you like that. Maybe next month it will make it up to you. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! Although, I'm not sure how much action you'll be getting with a bruised tail bone...That elephant just isn't going to get things done. ;)

    So...did you find any shoes?

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  5. Hopefully it will all work out for you in the near future and you'll get your Christmas wish.
    Now about that tailbone...you may need to go to the doctor if it doesn't get better soon. I actually broke mine. Wishing you the best!
    Cindy

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  6. hope you get better and that your 'gift' come soon, just on the right time :) all the best

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  7. Sending tons of virtual hugs your way - one painful experience is enough to ruin anyone's week, and it's really not fair that you've had to endure emotional turmoil on top of your physical hurt.

    At the same time, I must say that I'm always awed by your ability to turn negative events into humorous anecdotes - laughing in the face of misery is your gift, sister (and something that I wish I could do more often!).

    Hang in there - I'll be crossing my fingers for your Christmas wish to come true a few weeks early! <3

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  8. Big HUgs. I am praying next month that stick will say " You are a rockstar, your uterus is a diva, this is one sticky baby!" Or just "Pregnant". Either way, how ever #2 happens I'm saying prayers. Sorry about your butt crack, I promise I only giggled a little at that part.

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  9. I feel your pain about not being pregnant! I also took a test yesterday and it said "Not Pregnant"! Sort of bummed but maybe next month! Also I bruised my tailbone in high school and it really hurts! I am sorry you have a had a bad week!! :( Hope this weekend is a good one!

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  10. ow! I bruised my tailbone, only once, and I hope NEVER to do that again. It really hurts! Sorry the pregnancy test is talking to you. I wouldn't blame you a bit if you slapped it good and well and then dropped it down the garbage disposal. Thank you for all your kind words on my blog this week. They were sincerely appreciated.

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  11. I LOVE YOU AMO!! Sorry about your butt...that does hurt like the dickens!
    I can't imagine how it feels to keep having the negative tests...I'm so sorry. Give your little man a big hug and kiss...he'll make it some better, I think.
    And I want to Bloom as well...maybe we could be watered AND use fertilizer! Then we'd be beautiful!

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  12. Btw, did Carla send you the sites for gluten free meals? She's kinda forgetful sometimes...

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  13. That's right Amo find that humor girl and keep it near you always!!!! Glad you are feeling a little better-next month will work...next month will work...(-:

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  14. Oh hon, I'm so sorry to hear about your week. I really do hope that you get your wish soon. I'm glad your tailbone is starting to feel better though. I hope it only continues to get better, as I can only imagine how painful that must be. ((HUGS))

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  15. I'm sorry that this wasn't your month and I'm sorry that you bruised your tailbone. I'm really hoping that you'll find a positive very soon!

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  16. im so sorry that this has not been your week but things always get bad before they get better, so just relax (i know you hate me for saying it and i hate people that tell me to relax too) and enjoy the beautiful baby God has given you.

    i am sure he will bless you with another when the time is right @

    http://www.thewannabewahm.com

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  17. You are SOO going to get pregnant without surgery. I just know it!! I know, like me, you are ready for the new start of a new year so we can shake off 2009 which was kinda sucky. 2010 has a baby in there for you!

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  18. Okay, I rhought I posted a comment but I'm not seeing it

    First....I hope Santa fills that wish list for you! I will have a talk with him!

    The elephant between your legs made me laugh and want to make inappropriate comments. I will just be on my merry way with that :)

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  19. don't give up on the pregnancy thing - i will keep you in my thoughts on that one.

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